BAND AID 30: Class of 2014 (pic: Band Aid Trust)
BY NOW you may have been unfortunate enough to encounter the bleak, waxen faceof Bob Geldof smudged over the TV schedule.
Like bad fashion, every ten years Geldof makes a comeback, tethering himself to whatever the latest complex African issue is and then patronising it to meaninglessness via the medium of song.
This time Ebola has provided plucky Bob all the ammo he needs to start swearing inappropriately on the telly, majestically conflating a problem affecting three African countries into a narrative that suggests the whole continent is screwed.
Or, as Bob puts, it: "There’s a world outside your window and it’s a world of dread and fear. Where a kiss of love can kill you, where there’s death in every tear."
To be honest, that whole 'kiss of love can kill you' bit sounds like he's been watching too much Nollywood – except we all know he hasn't.
We know he hasn't because Geldof seems entirely, almost wilfully clueless about the culture and lifestyle of a continent he's scraped a handsome career out of.
So it should come as little surprise that despite the last decade being a widely acknowledged golden age for African pop, with a galaxy of feted stars worldwide, Geldof hasn't managed to find a single contemporary African pop musician to sing his dodgy lyrics.
Fuse ODG – the most credible Afrobeats star the UK has yet produced – revealed that he turned down the invitation to appear on Band Aid 30 after seeing the lyrics.
"Big up Sir Bob Geldof & his heart”, wrote Fuse. “He approached me about being on the Band Aid song, however upon receiving the proposed lyrics I felt the message of the Band Aid 30 song was not in line with the message of The New Africa movement (TINA)...
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